Thanks so mmuch for your feedback and just support.
Talked to Dad and his long time girlfriend Rogene (said ROsheen) and really Dad is 'making progress' towards making a decision but sees no urgency because he does not feel Rogene is leaving anytime soon and the truth is Rogene is not being blunt or direct with him and is enabling him. I have no leverage with Dad when she is there in the house soft pedaling around what he needs, and when she is leaving.... and has not set any dates to move out.
My plan. continue to follow through w attorney (but there is not a safety issue with her there) and write a letter to Dad and her .. very direct to the point and call then and then let things be. I have done all I can at this point and until Rogene takes some action (vs complaining to me) and insteads talks to Dad. I mean he can still think,and understand that she is leaving I do not see he will move and really he is not in danger with her there either.
Crazy but can not keep beating my head on the wall and have been taking too much time for work anyway
Hoping my letter and laying it out for Rogene helps and really hoping he decides to sign the lease or show interest by the 18th. Upsetting. These places are NOT easy to come by and this one is close, reasonable and DOES have memory care..and they met him already.
Anyway that is the plan. take the tough stance w Rogene and Dad btu really if Rogene actually sets a date to leave .. Dad will likely move and I am also going to be direct and say that his confusion episodes present a health/safety hazard so he is not able to live on his own (he is talking about staying in the house until it is sold.. hellooo??) and I will need to call services and then since he is out state they will have control. not me.
I will also follow up w the attorney on guardianship but already talking to the first guy unless Dad is an danger (and w ROgene there 24/7 w no moving on date hard to prove) I have no case.. I do not envision this going that route but really is Rogene would just take stand w HIM not me it would be very helpful.
Trying my best but hard and crazy.
My plan w Dad